My Reverse Resolutions

goodbye2013

We all reflect on our lives on this first day of a new year.

And traditionally make resolutions that 99% of us won’t keep.

Which is why I was enthralled to read the Reverse Resolutions over on the Little Lilypad Co blog this week.

It’s a fabulous idea of looking back over the previous 12 months and congratulating yourself on what you have achieved, rather than setting impossible goals which make you feel a failure when you don’t live up to them.

So I’m starting 2014 on a positive note, with my list of good things I have made happen in 2013.

And the hope that more good things are to come in the next 12 months.

My achievements in 2013 include:

 

Blakeschoolcollage

Delivering a (second) bright and well-adjusted child to school

Blake strode through the doors for his first day at school without a backward glance. And a huge part of that is down to the secure home me and Mr G have provided for him. He is confident and sociable at school, and despite my worries that he was a bit of a Mummy’s boy he enjoys his time with his classmates and seems eager to learn. Despite being a very different character to Brodie, my little one seems to enjoy school just as much as his brother. Blake is my baby and I miss him like hell, so we’ve both had to adjust to being apart. But I think we’ve entered this new phase in our lives pretty much unscathed.

 

SJB_9264

Becoming a part of our church community

We’ve always wanted to raise the boys in the Christian faith. It’s not for everyone, and I suppose I’ve held off out of fear that we wouldn’t fit in. But with the encouragement of a friend, we joined our local church at the beginning of 2013 and put the boys into Sunday school. My father-in-law Keith, who died of cancer in 2011, was an elder in his church and we also felt we were doing something special in his memory. Everyone has been so welcoming and the boys have loved it. Over the Summer I volunteered as an adult helper for the kids’ holiday club and took them along – which was lots of fun. I rounded off the year by taking Brodie along to be part of the nativity/panto staged to raise money for the church lighting fund. My plan was to work behind the scenes while my boy performed – but we both ended up with roles. It was hard work, but at the beginning of December Brodie proudly starred as a sheep/angel while I was Herod’s advisor in a hilarious family production. Proving church is not the stuffy environment some people might think.

 

40

Saying farewell to my 30s

OK so I didn’t have any choice in this one. But reaching this milestone really made me reflect on what I came through in the last decade – which has been so much about sacrifice and making a family. I celebrated with a Summer party in the garden with friends and relatives. Turning 40 hasn’t been painful at all, but I suppose like a New Year it’s made me feel like I’m starting a new chapter – like the next decade is a fresh start and I shouldn’t shy away from any new challenges. Which leads me onto….

 

working mum

Facing my fear of getting back to work

When I got my first opportunity to go back into the workplace, I almost turned it down. What if I failed? What if I didn’t like my colleagues – or they didn’t take to me? It wasn’t my ideal role and it was only temporary, so it would have been easy to use that excuse to stay in my little bubble at home. But we needed the extra cash and I decided it might just give me a confidence boost. It has. Facing my fear has not only helped me meet some lovely people and prove that I still have a lot of talents and skills (other than wiping snot and refereeing tantrums) but it’s also brought me a new and exciting opportunity – which is making 2014 look very promising. (But I’ll reveal more about this in the very near future).

 

findingvoice

Learning to have a voice

Going through PND and having counselling to discover why I felt so invisible has taught me to be brave and have a voice. I’ve only been invisible because I’ve allowed myself to be. When something really mattered to me this year, I have spoken up. Despite the fear it might make me unpopular. Because staying silent, while my mind screams “What about me?” is no way to keep friends. Speaking up for myself on important issues and seeing who sticks by me is the only way to know true friends – and the rest weren’t really friends in the first place.

 

 

So happy 2014 everyone. Good luck if you’ve made resolutions.

Don’t beat yourself up if you don’t keep them. Try to focus on the things in life you have achieved.

Because if we all look hard enough, there’s plenty to congratulate ourselves for.

23 Thoughts on “My Reverse Resolutions

  1. What a great idea, and you have achieved so much through the year! I do love the photo of you all in your dressing gowns in the Nativity play! I don’t set resolutions as such, more a list of things that I hope to accomplish in the year, but I try and make them achievable rather than open ended. Congratulations on everything you’ve achieved!
    Jennifer recently posted…My word for 2014 – SimplifyMy Profile

  2. Wonderful to focus on your achievements! And what a year you have had!
    maggy, red ted art recently posted…Valentine’s Cards for Kids: Paper QuillingMy Profile

  3. Fantastic! I think it is much better to think about what you have achieved. You have made some fantastic things happen in 2013 and I think you are going to completely rock 2014 xx
    Kirsty recently posted…Pizza Base SnowflakesMy Profile

  4. What a positive way to end an year – and it makes you really open to what might be possible in 2014! x
    Mammasaurus recently posted…34. How does Your Garden Grow?My Profile

  5. What a great way to look at the past year. Sounds like you achieved some amazing things, so give yourself a big pat on the shoulder. Here’s to an equally fantastic 2014 for you and your loved ones x
    Carolin recently posted…2013 in photos and our plans for 2014My Profile

  6. I much prefer this way of looking at life, we can easily focus on all the things that we have not achieved in our day to day lives when in fact we achieve far more than we fail at.
    Boo Roo and Tigger Too recently posted…REVIEW: Wentworth Wooden Puzzles: The Fairy Ring – Twilight DancersMy Profile

    • Too right. I started last year with the usual weight loss resolution – which hasn’t happened. So this year I’m going to keep trying to better myself in any way I can. But I won’t beat myself up if my target size 12 figure continues to elude me :-(

  7. Love this! I reckon it’s totally the way to go in terms of resolutions, focusing on the good is infinitely better than concentrating on what’s wrong. Here’s to a flipping wonderful 2014 to you and your gorgeous family :) xx
    MummyNeverSleeps recently posted…WhoaMy Profile

  8. Cass@frugalfamily on January 2, 2014 at 7:47 pm said:

    What a brilliant idea x

    Here’s to a great 2014

  9. Donna – this is a brilliant post, I love it and it’s one of the best I’ve read for ages x May 2014 continue accentuating the positive x
    Jenny from Cheetahs In My Shoes and Just Photos By Me recently posted…2013 at Whipsnade ZooMy Profile

  10. oh Donna this is a wonderful idea and how lovely to reflect on the good things instead of the failings. I think we are too good at finding fault with ourselves instead of praising ourselves (I am very guilty of this actually). Hmmmm food for though indeed and i might have to borrow this (if i have time to write another post this week).
    Looking back at your achievements , i think you have done so well to return to work and join your church group and cope with your son starting school (I was an emotional wreck when B started in Sept) and of course turn 40 (something i have to face later this year booo)
    good on you!! and thank you for linking up xxx
    jenny paulin recently posted…My Ordinary Moments 2013 (Flashback Friday)My Profile

  11. Emma The Mini Mes and Me on January 3, 2014 at 8:51 pm said:

    Well done in going back to work, it is a difficult transition. I look forward to hearing your exciting news :) x

  12. What a great idea. Glad starting school went well, and that you are all fitting into your church – that was a lovely tribute (I am sorry for your loss). Thanks for letting me know that 40 is still as fab and well done on your job.

    Here’s to 2014.

  13. Such a cool idea, I’m going to draw up my own list, 2013 was a tough year for so many of us, but already thinking back, there were lots of great things in my life. Congrats on all your achievements, particularly managing to turn around PND and use your experience in a positive way. Thanks so much for linking up with the #AllAboutYou Link & Pin Party. I’m just off to pin your post to the #AllAboutYou Pinterest Board now and then I’ll be hopping over to the #AllAboutYou Google+ Community to post it in there too! Look forward to seeing you at the party same time next week!
    Luci – Mother.Wife.Me recently posted…Should we force little children to kiss and hug friends and relatives?My Profile

  14. I love reverse resolutions – it is so very half-full of you! This post is a really good reminder to cheer ourselves on, and if you don’t do it, why should anyone else? Thank you for reminding me of that, I rather needed this post today. Thanks for joining in with #AllAboutYou, hope to see you next week!

  15. A brilliantly positive post. Well done on all those achievements and sending good wishes for a great 2014 :) #allaboutyou
    Lisa from Lisa’s Life recently posted…New-fangled Baking.My Profile

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

CommentLuv badge

Post Navigation